Wednesday, June 16, 2010

I Just Don't Know What To Do With Myself (OST My Best Friend's Wedding)



I just don't know what to do with myself 
Don't know just what to do with myself 
I'm so used to doing everything with you 
Planning everything for two 
And now that we're through 

I just don't know what to do with my time 
I'm so lonesome for you it's a crime 
Going to a movie only makes me sad 
Parties make me feel as bad 
When I'm not with you 
I just don't know what else to do 

Like a summer rose 
It needs the sun and rain 
I need your sweet love to ease all the pain 
I just don't know what to do with myself

Just waiting for you 
I'm still so crazy for you 

Scattered Sunbeams



I reach out to touch you
But I have to make do
With the dregs of a memory
I long to bask in your warmth
But it eludes me
And I am left with only scattered sunbeams
My mind tells me that
I cannot live without you
But I will not live with you
I am unable to let you go
To do the right thing
My heart will not tear away
So, I wait
And I pray
And I cling to faith

Thursday, June 10, 2010

Kissed by a Raindrop

Dedicated to: the Art of Fact-ion, confession, contemplation, rain and Sunshine.
***
On a beach, sand beneath my feet
On a shaded, tree-lined street
Thinking, walking, contemplating
When I’m kissed by a raindrop
Eyes meet eyes, wondrously see
A smile, laughter, then, breaking free
Looking, feeling, contemplating
When I’m kissed by a raindrop
Hold my hand and with me, run
Run until we catch the sun
Let the raindrops melt away
Let the sunshine light our way
Run into the light, you’ll see
The making of our destiny
Thoughts and raindrops melt away
Let’s run into a whole new day
***
To hear the audio version, click the ‘Bribe’ button. :P

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

The Magician's Promise (Part VI)

She had set off on a quest for Fles, but finding her way out of Erusaelp was not easy. Every time she thought she had nearly reached the end of the empire, high, insurmountable, stone walls greeted her.

She heard that the broken-hearted prince had locked himself up in his palace. She was glad he had not tried to stop her; his love had set her free to pursue her dream.

Every day, she ached for the prince and for the pleasures of Erusaelp. More than once, she retraced her steps and found herself in the radius of the palace. However, each time her hand reached up to knock at the massive gates, her soul burned for Fels, and she turned her back to Erusaelp once again.

As she took one wrong turn after another, she realised that she was no longer the confident, sprightly girl, out on an adventure. Her time at Erusaelp had weakened her, in body, mind and spirit. Her legs failed to carry her any great distance without long rests, her mind was haunted with thoughts of the prince and the only thing that dragged her weary spirit was the memory of the glimpse she had got of the Magician's eyes just before she had sunk into the quicksand. 

She knew that the Magician had not left her side, but her confused thoughts could not comprehend how to reach out to him. She clung on to the bag of stardust, the only vestige of her beloved Magician. A few times, she had shaken the bag, hoping for a sign, but the stardust just lay at the very bottom, shimmering weakly, as if dead. 

She knew that her distraction at Erusaelp had strayed her off the path towards Fels, but she also knew that it was not irrevocable. Her Magician would not fail her. On what could only be called a journey of faith, she kept her eyes open for a sign - any sign - that would help her find her way.

In Zevarstan, a merchant offered her prosperity beyond imagination. He assured her that she would never want for  anything again. The she-dwarves of Yari offered to remain her life-long companions, always by her side through pain and pleasure. The city of Allures abounded with men as handsome as demi-gods, charming enough to steal the heart of any young girl. But, she turned her back to them all, walking on in single-minded pursuit of her quarry.

One day, however, sheer humanness took over. She was alone, in the middle of an abandoned, overgrown corn field. Her feet were scorched in the burning sun, her delicate complexion had turned brown, her legs could not take another step and her spirit was crushed. She collapsed in the middle of a dirt path, defeated. She cried out to the heavens, "I can do no more. Save me, oh, Magician!" And she broke down and sobbed.

Her humble tears fell on the little bag of stardust lying on her side. She thought she saw it tremble every so slightly. She took it in her hand and undid the string binding the bag. The bag shivered and shook in her hands. Suddenly, with a great whoosh, the stardust flew out and high in the sky, as if revelling in its freedom. In a few moments, its coolness was encircling her again, making her body glow in exactly the same way it had when the Magician had promised to always be by her side.

She smiled, welcoming the sparkling gift - an old, comforting friend. She held out her calloused hands and it floated over, soothing them. The aches melted into softness, the stardust acting as salve on her burns. Her heart felt lighter than it had in years, and a brilliant spark seemed to light up every corner of her mind. Her whole being was awash with the Magician's presence. The healing had begun.

The Magician's Promise (Part V)

It was one such day at the sea-side. Words melted into silence as the sun changed colours. They sat in companionable quietude until the prince turned to look straight at her. She waited expectantly, the melodious chirping of the home-bound birds lightly falling on her ears.
In a voice heavy with a thousand unsaid words, he said, “I can make you Queen of Erusaelp.”
The world seemed to spin around her. Queen of Erusaelp… Queen of Fels… I can make you Queen… Heart’s greatest desire… The prince… The Magician…
She could feel the stardust pushing against the confines of the bag, the gift reminding her of the giver. A voice from her past… those radiant eyes… all-knowing, mysterious smiles… An explosion of colours and sounds from her past…
“Ohhh… What have I done! I have to go…” she said, hastily getting up, trying to regain her balance.
The prince looked at her, bewildered. “What is wrong? Do you not feel the same way? Have I fallen short?” he asked.
She stopped and slowly turned towards him. She looked into the eyes of the prince who had shown her Erusaelp, the friend she had shared laughter and conversations with, the man her heart had grown to be so fond of.
She touched his face and gently said, “It is not you, oh, Prince!” she said. “It is I who has erred… I was to be Queen of Fels, and I have misled you.”
“Fels! Will you leave your prince and wondrous Erusaelp for a land that is spoken about only in stories?” he cried.
“Fels may be a fairytale for many, but for me, it is the greatest reality. I have tarried too much. I must leave at once,” she replied, hastily gathering her things.
“Then, let me come with you,” the prince beseeched her.
She paused and attended to the memory nudging at the corner of her mind.
***
“I will tell Mother and Father at once. Oh, and all my friends, too! We will set off for Fels at dawn,” she said to the Magician, happily.
“My dear,” he replied. “This is a journey you will have to undertake without them.”
She pondered about what he had said. “But you will be with me?” she asked, timidly.
The Magician conjured up a puff of sparkling stardust. It encircled her and made her body glow. He said, “I will always be by your side.”
***
“I have to find my own way,” she said. Her heart tore in pain, but her eyes were determined.
She took a final, long look at the Prince and then walked away from Erusaelp forever.

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

The Magician's Promise (Part IV)

The days melted into months, but Erusaelp did not cease to fascinate her. She had opened her eyes to a whole new world, and it was exciting, mesmerising.

With the prince as her escort, she explored the grandeur of Erusaelp. They visited bejewelled castles with sky-high turrets, ate sumptuous feasts of a variety she had never tasted before, held each other while they laughed at the court jester's antics and watched the sun rise from the jagged peaks of the faraway mountains... 

Her favourite activity, however, was to sit by the prince's side and gaze as the sun set into the sea. At these times, he would tell her all about Erusaelp and its myriad delights. It was a center of great knowledge, she learnt. He had come there to 'fill his cup' as he liked to say, away from the luxuries of his father's palace in another part of their empire. The people of Erusaelp held great affection for him, and he treated them with kindness and patience. Someday, he wanted to become able enough to take the role of the Emperor.

She would tell him about her family, her home and her friends. Often, she started to tell him about the Magician, but that was something he was unable to understand, and then she would stop and change the subject.

She enjoyed his company very much, and they never ran out of things to converse about. She was drawn to him like a magnet. Amidst the raptures of Erusaelp, the new-found laughter and the never-before feelings that fluttered in her heart, she did not find the need to talk about the Magician at length.

The Magician's Promise (Part III)

When she came to, she was surprised to find herself… alive!

She looked around. She seemed to be in some kind of a dimly lit room with a very high, muddy brown ceiling. She got to her feet and followed what seemed to be the only exit.

She had barely taken a few steps when a man approached her. He was young, about her age, and walked with a spring in his step.

“At last, you have awoken. I was beginning to worry,” he said with a smile.

His smile put her at ease instantly.

“Where am I? Who are you?” she asked.

“Well, you are on the other side of the quicksand. There’s a world beyond yours, too, you see,” he said, with a hint of playful sarcasm. “I am the prince of Erusaelp.”

“Oh!” she said, suddenly realising that she was in the presence of royalty. It reminded her of another place, another time…

***

“Are you happy?” the Magician asked her, his all-knowing eyes piercing through her. She felt he could read her soul, but he chose to let her answer.

“I have the knowledge of a thousand books, companions who adore me and wealth to fulfill my heart’s desires,” she answered.

He waited.

She paused, then, sighed. “Suddenly, it does not seem good enough,” she told him, truthfully. “I want something more… supreme.”

He nodded, his eyes sparkling mysteriously.

“I can make you the Queen of Fles,” he said.

Her eyes widened. Her breath caught in her throat.

Until the Magician said it, Fles has existed for her in legends and myths alone. It was said to be the kingdom above all kingdoms, the most powerful, the most magical… In quiet, moonlit nights, she had dreamt of it. In moments of solitude, her heart had cried out for it. Although she had never admitted it, least of all to herself, she knew that Fles was her heart’s greatest desire. And here, the Magician was telling her she could be its Queen!

“How?” she whispered.

He smiled one of his many secret smiles. And his eyes told her that all she needed to do was trust him, completely. That was not difficult in the least.

Her being fired up. She put her hand in his. She was ready.

The Magician knew. “I promise to make you Queen of Fles,” he told her. And she knew that the Magician would keep his promise.